People Are Sharing Their Real Experiences With Gentle Parenting, And It’s So Honest Posted by Megan Liscomb Last Updated: January 5, 2024 Donations Make us online People Are Sharing Their Real Experiences With Gentle Parenting, And It’s So Honest When I was a kid in the ’80s and ’90s, getting yelled at and/or spanked were pretty standard punishments in my house and at in the homes of my friends. So even though I’m not a parent myself, I’ve been super fascinated with all the gentle parenting content I’m seeing online. But we all know that social media doesn’t always show the full truth. So I asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to share what their real life experiences with gentle parenting have been like, and their responses were so honest and inspiring. Here’s what they had to say: 1. “As I have applied gentle parenting to my younger kids, they behave more confidently and assertively than my older children I was authoritarian with. My older kids know how to quickly get a task done and read the room better, but they also struggle with addiction and self worth.” 2. “I’ve been gentle parenting my son (I’m a child of an authoritarian father who spanked and yelled). I never have and never will ever use physical punishment on my child; I set boundaries; I let my son know that his choices and behaviors will result in A/B/C consequences and it’s his choice to make (unless safety is an issue), and I enforce those consequences.” 3. “We have a 2 and a half year old daughter and a 9 month old son and I’ve tried to gradually ease into more of the gentle parenting style. I’m also trying to get my boyfriend on the same page and he’s getting there. He was raised around toxic masculinity, so it’s that mold I’m desperately trying to break. He’s definitely more of a ‘raise your voice and yell’ type, and I’m trying to shift his mindset by the things I’ve picked up on.” 4. “I ‘gentle parented’ which yes, is just treating your child with the same respect that you would expect from and give anyone. Discussing bad behavior without shaming them, blah, blah, blah. He’s 30 now and is the spitting image of his abusive father and in return doesn’t speak to me. Yay parenthood.” 5. “I find there are all these rules and different takes on social media about what gentle parenting is. People are different. You’re not going to get the same results from every child. I also know some very emotionally well adjusted adults whose parents did not ‘gentle parent’ but were present and good people. That seemed to be enough.” 6. “I have been using gentle parenting with my children for a decade now and I believe it has really helped my children to be kinder and more respectful. It was hard going when they were younger, as any style of parenting would be, but I feel we’re reaping the rewards now. It’s very frustrating that there are so many myths about it.” 7. “Not a parent but a teenage sibling. I babysit my four siblings at least 12 hours a week, with the youngest being 2. This has been going on for about six months now, and while watching them I try to use gentle parenting. I’ve seen the most improvement with my youngest sibling, especially in comparison to how the rest of my siblings behave.” 8. “My husband and I have three boys, ages 10, 8, 6. We have been doing our best to be gentle parents, and it is HELLA HARD, especially with rowdy boys. We try our best to explain things to them vs simply yelling and getting mad, we are honest with them, we lovingly correct them, we listen to them, we say we are sorry and apologize when we do mess up, and we love to spend time with and get to know them.” 9. “As much as I try gentle parenting, when things get really hectic or stressful I find myself raising my voice, the way my mom did when I was young. I want to raise my child with a kinder, gentler method than what I was given.” 10. And finally, “In my short lived experience gentle parenting a 2.5 year old, I think it all comes down to what work you’ve done yourself. If you’ve worked through your own issues from childhood and have grown into an adult with a stable foundation and a lot of emotional intelligence, gentle parenting can be a great framework.” Are you using gentle parenting techniques? Tell us about your experiences in the comments. Source link
When I was a kid in the ’80s and ’90s, getting yelled at and/or spanked were pretty standard punishments in my house and at in the homes of my friends. So even though I’m not a parent myself, I’ve been super fascinated with all the gentle parenting content I’m seeing online. But we all know that social media doesn’t always show the full truth. So I asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to share what their real life experiences with gentle parenting have been like, and their responses were so honest and inspiring. Here’s what they had to say: 1. “As I have applied gentle parenting to my younger kids, they behave more confidently and assertively than my older children I was authoritarian with. My older kids know how to quickly get a task done and read the room better, but they also struggle with addiction and self worth.” 2. “I’ve been gentle parenting my son (I’m a child of an authoritarian father who spanked and yelled). I never have and never will ever use physical punishment on my child; I set boundaries; I let my son know that his choices and behaviors will result in A/B/C consequences and it’s his choice to make (unless safety is an issue), and I enforce those consequences.” 3. “We have a 2 and a half year old daughter and a 9 month old son and I’ve tried to gradually ease into more of the gentle parenting style. I’m also trying to get my boyfriend on the same page and he’s getting there. He was raised around toxic masculinity, so it’s that mold I’m desperately trying to break. He’s definitely more of a ‘raise your voice and yell’ type, and I’m trying to shift his mindset by the things I’ve picked up on.” 4. “I ‘gentle parented’ which yes, is just treating your child with the same respect that you would expect from and give anyone. Discussing bad behavior without shaming them, blah, blah, blah. He’s 30 now and is the spitting image of his abusive father and in return doesn’t speak to me. Yay parenthood.” 5. “I find there are all these rules and different takes on social media about what gentle parenting is. People are different. You’re not going to get the same results from every child. I also know some very emotionally well adjusted adults whose parents did not ‘gentle parent’ but were present and good people. That seemed to be enough.” 6. “I have been using gentle parenting with my children for a decade now and I believe it has really helped my children to be kinder and more respectful. It was hard going when they were younger, as any style of parenting would be, but I feel we’re reaping the rewards now. It’s very frustrating that there are so many myths about it.” 7. “Not a parent but a teenage sibling. I babysit my four siblings at least 12 hours a week, with the youngest being 2. This has been going on for about six months now, and while watching them I try to use gentle parenting. I’ve seen the most improvement with my youngest sibling, especially in comparison to how the rest of my siblings behave.” 8. “My husband and I have three boys, ages 10, 8, 6. We have been doing our best to be gentle parents, and it is HELLA HARD, especially with rowdy boys. We try our best to explain things to them vs simply yelling and getting mad, we are honest with them, we lovingly correct them, we listen to them, we say we are sorry and apologize when we do mess up, and we love to spend time with and get to know them.” 9. “As much as I try gentle parenting, when things get really hectic or stressful I find myself raising my voice, the way my mom did when I was young. I want to raise my child with a kinder, gentler method than what I was given.” 10. And finally, “In my short lived experience gentle parenting a 2.5 year old, I think it all comes down to what work you’ve done yourself. If you’ve worked through your own issues from childhood and have grown into an adult with a stable foundation and a lot of emotional intelligence, gentle parenting can be a great framework.” Are you using gentle parenting techniques? Tell us about your experiences in the comments.
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