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“I’m a 24-year-old woman, and my 62-year-old dad is going out with a girl younger than me (she’s 23). Three years ago, my parents divorced. I’m their only child and live in my own apartment, while my mom got the family house and my dad bought a new place. They’ve been on friendly terms through their separation, which has made some things much easier. But my dad’s actions following their split have been causing issues. He started frequenting bars and going on blind dates most evenings. I can’t lie; my mom and I worried that he wasn’t coping well with the split, but he reassured us that he was a grown man and that we shouldn’t worry about him. I tried to step back and not meddle in his love life, and we didn’t talk about it much. But then, about a month ago, dad met up with mom and me to tell us about his new relationship. To our surprise, he pulled out his phone and showed us his new girlfriend — a 23-year-old.”
“Neither of us knew what to say, as my dad gushed about how wonderful she was and how she was an ‘old soul’ with whom he had a profound connection. He kept on and on until my mom essentially asked what the hell he was doing with a girl younger than his daughter. To be clear, the dates he told us about in the past had always been with women around his age. My dad didn’t take mom’s question well, arguing that she was a consenting adult and he wasn’t forcing her to be with him. My mom acknowledged that it was legal, to which my dad replied, ‘Then if you can’t support us, it’s your problem.’
I can’t deny it makes me uncomfortable. Last weekend, my mom had a family BBQ, and my dad asked if he could bring his girlfriend and introduce us. I arrived, and they were already there, and honestly, within two seconds of speaking to dad’s girlfriend, I felt so bad for her. She just seemed so childlike and nervous, and I felt super uncomfortable for her. Meanwhile, my dad was going around to the family talking about how great their relationship was and how he was ’23 at heart.’ People were clearly weirded out, but he didn’t seem to notice and kept making a show of kissing his girlfriend.
So yeah, I don’t know how to feel about this. I don’t like the relationship, but is it even my place to do anything about it? It’s at a point where I dread seeing my dad because I know he’ll talk endlessly about his girlfriend. If I try to tell him how I feel, what would I even say? I’m just at a loss and don’t know what to do.”
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