15.
“My partner and I started trying in early 2021. We tried conceiving for months, but it wasn’t working. An OBGYN found I had a polyp that might be preventing me from getting pregnant. I got surgery to have it removed along with a fibroid that they also found. I was diagnosed with PCOS, even though I had my period every month and went on treatment to get my progesterone levels high enough for my body to ovulate. The medication, Letrozole, can cause menopause-like symptoms as a side effect, which was not very fun. After months on treatment, I finally got pregnant, but when I got an ultrasound, we found there wasn’t a fetus growing in my uterus. Everything indicated a missed miscarriage and that my body would eventually pass it…”
“…For almost a month I had weekly ultrasounds, hoping something had changed and that maybe I just wasn’t as far along as we thought. But my HCG levels were going down, which is consistent with pregnancy loss. One morning I woke up in intense pain and thought about going to the bathroom only to regain consciousness minutes later, face down on a bath mat. I was rushed to the ER where they discovered my pregnancy had been ectopic, had ruptured, and the pain I felt was from my internal bleeding. Surgery had complications, and I ended up losing a fallopian tube. At the time, I was so grateful to be alive that I didn’t really process my loss. But as months went by, the grief would sneak in every once in a while. Someone close to me lost a baby, and it made me process my own loss. I would have been due in March. We’re still trying.”
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