21.
“This may be specific to my experience, but it was the tendency of the grown women in my life to simultaneously look down on and deify behaviors and attitudes associated with traditional feminity. Being squeamish about bugs or not great at playing catch? ‘Stop being such a girl!’ Going through a phase where you don’t want to wear a modest skirt or subdued makeup to church and instead want to look like a walking hot topic advertisement? ‘You need to change, that’s not ladylike!'”
“And, of course, there’s no real heads up on when it’s okay to ‘be a girl’ and when it isn’t. This strange man didn’t open the door for you even though you reached it at the same time, AND YOU LET HIM. SHAME. But you’re at home and want to leave the post-hole digging to your brother? ‘You have two hands and are able-bodied; go out and work”. It’s been super weird to make sense of as an adult.”
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