“We do have emotions — we just don’t feel entitled to express those emotions often (lest it harms us). Just asking to know what they are isn’t enough — we have to trust you aren’t going to invalidate our feelings. Unless you have some awareness of ‘unconditional regard’ and nonjudgemental listening, you are very likely to do so. If your social skills are only about talking without listening, a man is unlikely to actually open up to you (this may well be a universal trait rather than just with men).”
“I had an ex laugh at me for shaking after being in the middle of a shoot out — I was literally shaking. I’ve seen so much violence and stopped a ton of violence. I couldn’t tell where the shots were coming from — I hid and then ran.
She fucking laughed at me — a woman who had never seen any real violence in her life. She laughed at me for being scared and mocked me, saying: ‘I thought you were so tough, you’ve been through all this shit. Look at you shaking like a leaf.’
I’ve seen worse since then and handled worse since then. Fuck her — I could never share with her after that. That basically killed anything I would ever share with her, and she knew everything.”